Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Poop Happens

Not feeling very on top of the game today. My sweet, innocent little baby boy sprayed juicy, yellow poo all over me and all over my laundry room. This happened not once, not twice, not three times, but yes, four times. My purpose is not to gross you out with words that will give your mind graphic pictures but I just have to share.

You may be wondering how, I, a seasoned poo warrior, could allow such a catastrophe to take place. Let me share.

Last week, Hanna came down with quite a high fever and then sores on her throat and much grumpiness and sadness. I began to wonder if this might be Strep Throat. I took her to the doctor where I learned it was certainly not Strep Throat but more like Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease. Yuck. The doctor warned me that it would not be such a good thing if a tiny (I use that term loosely) baby like Drew got this lovely illness. He said to be on the lookout for a fever and/or rash. He said that if I suspected a fever I should take Drew's temperature and call if he had ANY fever, even a low one. He also was very clear that the temperature should be taken rectally to be accurate.

Jump to this morning. I thought Drew felt a little warm which got me to thinking maybe he had a fever. I remember the doctor's serious tone and look about tiny babies and fevers so I think I should take his temperature. Well I do not own a rectal thermometer so I call my friendly neighbor. She looks high and low but finds zero rectal thermometers. She kindly offers to run to the store to get one for me. I gratefully accept her offer. She returns with the thermometer and I review the instructions for operation with her. She leaves. I fetch the baby. I lay him on the changing pad which is on the counter in my laundry room. I lube up the thermometer with a little petro and disrobe the baby. I insert the thermometer and begin the wait. Suddenly, without warning, a stream of poo shoots from his bottom and sprays the thermometer, my hand and arm, the changing pad and the wall. "Oh crap!", I shout. I clean up the mess while chuckling to myself over the incident. The amount of poo that messed me and the room indicated to me that he should be empty so I start the process to take the temperature once again. I insert, I wait, I hear gas, it happens again! The poo sprays everything that I just cleaned off and a few additional items. Now the thermometer has poo inside of it. I'm not sure if the digital parts are going to work anymore but I'm determined to just get this over with. I don't clean up this time. Insert, wait and just like one of Pavlov's dogs barking at the sound of the bell, SQUIRT! "You have GOT to be kidding me!", I say through gritted teeth. I feel that I've lost control of this situation but I really need to get a reading from this thermometer which now is full of yellow juice. I go for it one more time. Success. The reading was 99 degrees which just so happens to be the temeperature the thermometer instruction said was normal. Praise be.

The clean-up was lengthy and drippy but all is now well.

I think I might write a letter to the thermometer company to see if maybe they could include a little blurb in their instructions. I don't know, like: "May cause oily discharge in very large amounts and it might be an explosive disaster so whatever you do idiot don't leave the baby's butt uncovered we can't believe we have to give this warning but you know there are stupid people out there who might not think to cover the baby's butt so here it is."

Would've saved me a lot of time (and wipes).

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Getting So Big!

While Drew is not quite 5 weeks old, he sure is losing his newborn looks. He's got two chins and his belly bears the resemblence of that of a man who can't put the beer can down. His newborn onesies are too short through the torso. When he's just eaten and his belly is oh so full, he grins a sideways grin. He's awake for longer periods of time and is becoming much more alert of what is going on around him. The other kids are starting to "play" with him more because he's starting to really see them and can flash a smile in response. It's so much fun to watch him grow...a little sad too as these first weeks are flying by so very quickly. I'm trying to make a point to really enjoy him each day and not just survive them!!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Happy Number Two!!!

I can't believe you're two today big girl! Where has a year and a half gone? You have become such a character. I love to hear your songs and watch you play. I can't imagine life without you. Whether you are happy, sad or mad, you live life out loud. What a unique and special girl you are! I love you with all of my heart sweet girl!